Was dating now friends
I had a friend whom I’d known for almost six years.I knew his passions and fears and appreciated his support through good and bad times, and over time he had become one of my best guy friends.
And while it’s easy to assume, as I did, that you know what the other person wants because you were friends already, relationships are never truly easy to navigate.
That’s why Kirschner advises, “If you’re not completely smitten [with your best friend], just keep it a friendship.” Because that’s usually the biggest risk of pursuing a romantic relationship with a friend: losing that friendship altogether.
I didn’t put in enough effort to dress up for our dinner dates, for example, or explain why I had to stay late at school. Our relationship had evolved from a platonic to romantic one, but because we knew each other first as friends, we took it for granted that we also knew each other’s relationship expectations, which became the root of many arguments.
Another problem with dating a close friend is that you might spend a lot of time with mutual friends, which could become awkward if the relationship doesn’t last.
“You’ve already taken that time to figure out that you’re compatible with each other,” says Winnie*, a 22-year-old recent college graduate.
“Beyond that initial attraction, the puppy love stage, and those first movie dates, you’ve already earned each other’s loyalty and trust.” Susan, a 27-year-old graduate school student who is currently dating someone she was friends with first, also agrees.
That said, what is love, and life, without a little risk?
Although my relationship crashed and burned, the lessons I learned were invaluable.
” I realized then that what I really wanted in my other half was compatibility in values, interests, and personality (which by then I knew my friend and I had). Diana Kirschner agrees that compatibility is the best thing about dating your best friend.
In the words of Kirschner, a relationship expert, psychologist, and author of Find Your Soulmate Online in 6 Simple Steps: “You can have it all in one package: friendship and romance.” In fact, many girls admit this combination is what makes dating a best friend so appealing—given your closeness and familiarity, you’re already halfway to a solid romantic relationship.
More precisely, would it make your relationship easier…or harder?Tags: Adult Dating, affair dating, sex dating